writer-director isabel coixet talks about bringing the story to the screen
"I've never really liked the films based on books. If there's a good book, what's the point in turning it into a film? But whenever you say, "I'II never do something like this", you eventually do it.

I bought the book just by pure chance I didn't even know the writer by then. I went into a bookshop and I was looking for another book by another writer whose name also begins with a "K". I saw the title, PRETENDING THE BED IS A RAFT, and I liked it. It was the title of the book that includes several short stories, but also the title of the last short story, which was the one I preferred. As a matter of fact, I had a sort of revelation when I read it; I knew perfectly well that there was a film in there.

"I had read the story many years ago and it never really left my mind. Even when I was making the promotion of my previous films... The journalists usually ask you about your new projects and I was always thinking about this story as my next project.

I haven't written a lot of scripts. It's kind of complicated for me... not the fact of writing the script as such but the decision to sit down and start writing it. However, when I finally found Ann's voice, I managed to finish it very fast.

In my opinion, the key for a good adaptation is just forgetting about the story that you're adapting. This story woke up in me very special things and I didn't want to follow the story anymore, but the things that the story had waken up inside me. The story became a platform, a mere excuse to talk about the things that I know the best, to talk about things that at the end of the day belonged to me.

In the short story, once Ann discovers she's going to die, she tells it to everyone. And I thought of the same situation but with a complete different reaction: what would happen if this person didn't tell anyone that she's going to die, what if she discovered that the greatest gift she could ever do to her family, especially to her kids, was not to burden them with the weight of her future death?

'Cause I would do exactly the same as the character of the short story, I would tell everyone that I'm going to die. I mean, I would get out of the hospital screaming and I would get into a taxi and I would tell the taxi driver that I'm going to die. I would share my grief with everyone around me; I would be commiserating myself all the time. But I wanted to make this film about a heroine, about the woman that I'd like to be and I am not. Because Ann is a heroine. She's not flawless, but there's no doubt she's a heroine.

I introduced some other changes too. I changed the names, she had one more son... And the original story took place in Louisiana, but I couldn't see my story in the summertime, in a sunny place. I needed the rain, the fog, the cold... I needed to shoot in Vancouver instead of Louisiana.

I also created some characters that weren't in the original story. The funny thing is that Nanci Kincaid, after reading my script, told me that she wanted to re-write her own story with those new characters in it."

about the production
Isabel Coixet was first inspired by the short story "Pretending the Bed is a Raft"(contained in the collection of the same name by author Nanci Kincaid). "There are very few things I read where I feel the urgency to make a movie," Coixet remembers today. " I bought the book in New York, didn't have any expectations, and took it with me on a long trip to Alaska." The story did not leave Coixet's mind after she finished it: "I began to see the other characters as vividly as the story showed Ann," she explains, "and the story's delicate tone left a tremendous impact."

A while later, Coixet had a meeting with producer Esther Garcia of El Deseo, the production company of Oscar winning director Pedro Almodovar (Garcia has worked in various production and creative capacities on most of Almodovar's films, most recently as director of production on the acclaimed "All About My Mother" and "Talk To Her.")

Garcia asked Coixet if she had any projects in mind for the future, and without hesitation Coixet remembered the short story by Nanci Kincaid, telling Garcia some of her ideas about adapting the story. " I had seen two of Isabel's previous films and loved them," says Garcia today, "and she told me about the way she wanted to re-invent the story. We knew there was going to be a marvellous film there." As Coixet adapted the story for the screen, she continued to be intrigued by the deeper issues that drove the main character: "What happens when she doesn't tell anyone the truth?" Coixet wondered. "Why does she keep it to herself, living as if nothing is happening? I think that secret gives her that freedom that makes the story so interesting."

One of the changes made was to reset the story's location from sultry New Orleans to Canada: Coixet laughs that the change was made because she doesn't like to work in hot, humid weather, but Garcia adds that making the film in Canada allowed the film to be very modestly budgeted. This was to be El Deseo's first production in English, and navigating to buy the rights for an American story on behalf of a Spanish production company to be produced in Canada proved to be a crash course in international film financing. "We needed some time before we figured all of that out," Garcia admits. Still, the unusual nature of the production was taken in stride by the El Deseo team: "El Deseo has a very eclectic taste," she explains, citing ventures into science-fiction ("Accion Mutante"), gothic horror ("The Devil's Backbone") and ensemble comedy ("Chill Out"), along with Pedro Almodovar's diverse oeuvre. "The story, the style or the director don't matter that much as long as we're passionate about the whole project and we feel we'll be able to be proud of the results."

It was Canadian born Sarah Polley who landed the role of Ann, and who turns in a performance that only reinforces her reputation as an accomplished and mature presence at the age of 23. "The problem with the main character was the same as the problem with the story," explains Esther Garcia. "She could be either too harsh or too soft." After auditioning dozens of actresses all over North America, Isabel Coixet found herself immediately taken by Polley's strength, commitment and insight into the character. "When I met Sarah in New York, I knew she was Ann," she remembers today. "From the beginning, we agreed on almost everything about Ann, the way she walks, the way she dresses. She really knows these people-when she and Scott Speedman (who plays Ann's husband, Don) took out the two young girls who played their daughters, people thought they were a real family."

What is most impressive about Polley's performance is the level of subtlety she brings to an extremely meaty role, a challenge that would have daunted most performers. In the scene where Ann first is told of her illness by a sympathetic and nervous young doctor (Julian Richings), we see the change in Ann, and we see her cover it up, a manoeuvre that will be repeated and grow richer and richer as the story progresses. "Sarah could be ugly, she could be sexy, she could be tough and sweet and everything at the same time," says Coixet. "She's living and breathing with the character, and we are with her-but anything bigger would have been too much."

Ann is in every scene of the film, and her voice-over narration guides us through what she knows will be her final weeks. Much of the story is constructed around scenes of Ann patiently trying to secretly prepare her family for life without her-she thinks about finding a potential mate for her husband and new mother for her daughters, hopes to finally encourage her depressed mother into happiness, and visits her father in prison after ten years of having no contact. She also resolves to get her nails done-an extravagance for Ann, who works as a janitor on the graveyard shift at a local college-and decides to take a lover, Lee, played by Mark Ruffalo ("You Can Count On Me").

Coixet assures that each performance is equally nuanced and rich, not only showcasing Polley's mesmerising presence but enhancing the display of talent from every single actor. Scott Speedman's Don is a perfect young everyman, smiling in the face of his own failures in the hope that things are about to get a lot better. Ruffalo who recently had to put his career on hold for surgery to remove a cancerous tumor in his head-brings charm and depth to Lee, who is reeling from a failed marriage and finds unexpected solace in the attention of the much younger Ann. Deborah Harry gives Ann's mother a tragic dimension that resonates with Ann's own family. Coixet is thrilled the way her ensemble responded to both the material and the atmosphere on the set during the five week shoot in Vancouver, British Columbia. "I think I'm good in creating the atmosphere," she says. I love working with actors, and these are very experienced actors who put a lot of trust in me. I try to do my best at loving them and trusting them and creating a space where they can breathe and begin to know the characters."

As Ann's story unfolds-and it becomes clear that there will be no miracle cure or last- minute reprieve as she struggles to hide her physical weakness to protect her family from the truth- "My Life Without Me," instead of lapsing into sentimentality, dares to explore the more difficult questions that Ann dares to answer for herself. "There's no such thing as normal people," Ann realises, as she makes her way through a world populated with those whose personal obsessions and weaknesses seem trivial compared to Ann's diagnosis-and yet Ann manages to elevate these people and treasure them because of their uniqueness instead of condemning or rejecting them.

As much as her choices begin to distance herself from her world, preparing her soul for the inevitable ("Lies are your only company," she observes), Ann also begins to succeed in touching people in secret, profound ways that ensure her remaining days will be a gift instead of a curse.

Producer Esther Garcia remarks at how audiences so far have reacted to the film:

"Even though you know from the beginning that Ann has no chance, this is not a tragic film. Obviously it can be sad, but you leave the theatre wanting to take all of the chances that life offers you every day. This is not a story about death, but about the joy of being alive and all that implies."